Sigh i rmb the days when i was young.. Cute,Innocent,Playful,Funny and carefree. Maybe its cos of my parents strictness? Or the freedom. Im not sure. Bud all i know. Its that i haf changed. Changed soo much. I used to be so playful. Bud i was kind. I was nice. I was most of all GUAI. Nevertheless my parents stood in the way of it. And maybe i guess age is another problem? As i grew up parents became stricter. I'm not sure why. Maybe cos of financial problems? being from carefree to stressed out. Stress i guess makes ppl angry. Makes ppl less tolerant. And being me. I always wanted everything. Nvr did care bout ppl around me. So.. soon enuf what my parents gave me wasnt enuf. And as i grew older. My life changed. More stress more sku more work. Wanting to escape all those is bad and sadly that was what i decided to do. The path... which i decided to take. The path of difficult return. And soon enuf everything that ppl nvr tot i could do has come true. All the expectations of me.. Were greatly lessened. I wasn't even expected good marks for psle. Getting 225 was a miracle. And than again. Nvr enuf for my parents. Always wanting the best.. Like me. Its in my genes i guess. Life was easy. Fail fail fail and haf fun. Now.. I'm going way astray. And i really need someone to get me on the right path. Bud im too stubborn. Maybe now. Bud i hope in the future i can wake up. I know saying all this is like making me realise something. Bud i jus cant change that easily. I hope help can come. Fun now. die later. Sigh. I hope all this things now do not affect me when i die. Hell or heaven. Thats my choice. I've always been faithful to God. I guess not enough to hear him. To take his advice, To listen to his words and To be enlightened by his encouragement. I'm so jealous of ppl who can hear him. That would mean almost everyone. Bud me. I will try and change in the later future. Not now though. I'm just too stubborn and immature. I need maturity. I hope i can get it soon. Reaching the age of 14. Maybe it'll come at 15? 16? 17? Or even later. I just wanna lead a stress free life....

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